January 26, 2010

Ke$ha is Desirable

We like exotic things. Like limited MAC holiday collections. Antique furniture. And having a gay guy best friend.

Unlike Ke$ha the "Tic Toc" girl. Everyone has a blonde friend who looks like Ke$ha. You go to a club on the weekend and you’ll see dozens of Ke$has skanking it out on the dance floor.

This is because being a Ke$ha is easy. Just do your make up and hair the day before and roll out of bed with it, get a major push up bra, and cover yourself with a litre of glitter like a good tranny ready to give it up to the highest bidder. If you can still feel your pores, then it means you haven't put enough make up and glitter on you!

And if you want to top Ke$ha, brush your teeth with a bottle of jack in front of a crowd of guys to show off some oral skills. That's how you get their attention, isn't it?? Well, let me know if there's a better way.