March 17, 2014

Easy Go

{Pictures via Free People}

There is nothing that last forever. 

Your job. Today at your manager-employee meeting, you might get an unexpected promotion, or you might lose your job.

Your car. When you drive home tonight, you might get into a car accident and total your current car.
 
Your health. Next time you go for check up you might find be diagnosed with some disease where you only have a few months to live.

Your luck. Next week you might win the jackpot and decide to book a one way ticket to somewhere tropical and leave the country for good.

Your friends. When you hang out with your friend, it might be the last time. It might be the last time you go over to their place and it might be the last conversation you have with them. People drift apart.


There's nothing wrong with friendships drifting apart. People change. People decide that they want other things in life. They go to college and decide they want friends in their faculty. They get into music and suddenly want to be around musicians all day. They decide they are fashion conscious and want to be surrounded by beautiful and fashionable people. They achieve what they consider success, and then they want to be around more successful and chic friends. They get married and decide that they want to hang out with more married and 'stable' people. They might decide to give up in life and smoke weed all day. Or move to some third world country and you never hear from them again. Change is inevitable and necessary in our development.

I've accepted that friends drift apart. It's natural. It happens very often. After a while the only communication you have with them is 'like' their Facebook post sometimes, not because you actually like it, but to support them in what they're doing that makes them happy, and they might do the same back.

But what I don't accept is how some people approach friendship drifting. Ignoring texts and calls for months. Deciding that it's okay to do something that might offend their former friend because hey you're drifting apart anyway who cares. Giving them the cold shoulder in public without them having a clue on your actual intention.

All that time your friend was there. Helping you move multiple times, getting out of her pajamas to visit when you're down, supporting your hobby, picking and dropping you off without ever complaining about gas prices, defending you to others when they talk behind behind your back, helping you pick up and load discounted furniture that tear and dent the leather backseat of their car.

Is a text saying "hey sorry I'm busy!" to gently brush it off, or smile with small talk in public when you bump into each other and then walk the other direction so hard for you to do? Is it so difficult to remain consideration and respect the former friendship instead of just outright surprising and pissing them off?

There is a more graceful and gentle way to drift apart. 

You owe your former friend that much.

15 comments:

  1. Love those dresses! They are awesome!! :)
    Not time to read the whole text... but I hope you are fine!!
    xx

    Eli

    www.acurlystyle.blogspot.com

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  2. I really like the dresses and the pictures...the text is on point, I have experienced that and it is a very bitter sensation.

    hugs
    Andy
    theblacklkabelblog.blogspot.com

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  3. People come and go; that's just how life is. Acceptance is something that is quite hard to do for some and sometimes, people tend to exaggerate the drifting apart thing. I still consider my highschool and college friends as my friends even though we do not hangout much anymore. I am with people who are in the same field as I am and, sometimes, it's just easier that way; but that doesn't mean the friendship will completely vanish.

    On a lighter note, I love the pictures! :)


    xoxo,
    Gelleesh.com

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  4. I've had a couple friends drift apart, and it's always sad, but at least we're still considerate of each other. To outright reject any friendship that may have existed? That's just rude.

    The Dragonfruit Diaries

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  5. I'm glad that my close friends and I still keep in contact. There is only a few of them, but they have always been there for me.

    xxDenysia Yu
    http://thatlaitgirl.com

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  6. Pop, this resonated with me... I couldn't agree more... deep friendship deserves that much...

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  7. Some people suck. That explains do much in life, but you deserve better from someone who called themselves a friend.

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  8. I agree, you hit the nail on the head :)

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  9. Someone who called themselves a friend shouldn't treat their friends like this!

    Hope everything's good!
    Lots of kisses
    Angelina - http://www.just-angelina.com/

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  10. So true, although, unfortunately I am guilty of a lot of the bad-drifting-away-friend-behavior-you-mentioned. When I was in college, I ignored a lot of my high school associates texts and calls until they eventually left me alone all together. I know now that I shouldn't have behaved like that, but back then I was still young and inexperienced. I'm finding that there are a lot of situations in life that you won't know how to handle until you mess up.

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  11. what a coincidence, this is actually literally happening to me right now!!! I have a good friend who suddenly drifted without any word or reason whatsoever. She was just plain gone. The last time we saw each other was Dec 2013 after Christmas. We spoke a little last January, then that was it. She stopped replying to my texts, she doesn't answer or return my calls, she doesn't respond to any of my message via FB, IG, etc.... I've called and called and called... but nothing.

    It is pissing me off and I don't know why she became like that so suddenly. We're really great friends, and we didn't fight or had an argument of any sort. Now, that I'm really pissed, I'm like "What the hell, who cares" in my head. Karma's a b***ch!

    Random Beauty by Hollie

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  12. It hurts me a little bit reading this post. I feel saddened for some lost friendship because of not keeping in touch. :(

    Love,
    Ericka of http://myfashionfelicity.blogspot.com
    bloglovin: http://www.bloglovin.com/en/blog/11492583
    GIVE AWAY ON MY BLOG! http://myfashionfelicity.blogspot.com/2014/02/sammydresscom-give-away.html

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  13. The pictures at the beginning are beautiful :) I agree that friendships ending is a natural thing, but it should happen on good terms...I went through this recently with someone who was my best friend since we were about 5 years old. Couldn't believe she's suddenly ignore me, when I needed her the most. *sigh* But new friends come along when we open our hearts to forgive and forget ♥

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